[go to http://bit.ly/covid-ode for film version]
Volatility’s up, my stock’s gone down,
My net wealth’s slipped right under.
I’ve been stitched right up, rolled slam flat
by a juggernaut of a side-wīnder.
I’m now unemployed.
I’m now dumbstuck.
I stare into a void.
The cobra has struck.
This cough and this fever are making me wonder
if I have succumbed to life’s final blunder.
Inflamed, distressed, feeling cells ript asunder:
I’m being crushed by an awesome anaconda.